Ruby - Astari Boedikoentjara
This is why Time Machine is only fiction
You can only look back
to search for what you’ve lacked:
Words you should’ve said…
I’m just a number,
not a person,
at least according to them.
If I die as the only one,
then it doesn’t matter.
I’m just a dot in their statistics.
Go ahead
Just pretend you’ve never done anything bad
My suffering is what you claim
as me, playing the victim
The longer this calamity lasts,
How can you catch a break
at the never-ending hurdles before you?
The bumps and cracks are nothing new.
More endless tasks to finish too.
Sysyphus must’ve been a human pinball,
Mommy, I'm scared
We've talked about this before
briefly, but I was still being straight
to the point that worries you more
Mommy, I'm still scared
Last night you appeared
right there in my dream
as real as I refused to see
you smirked at me, it seemed
“I haven’t got you yet,”
Battle of the sexes:
That woman scares you.
She has more opinions than you do.
Have I told you that comfort zone is temporary?
Go ahead, call me crazy.
Have I told you that a safe space is an illusion?
It’s our own creation.
It’s just like us.
It doesn’t really last.
All apologies
Set me free
from the same, old miseries
no point in getting angry
but tortured in ‘so-called’ stoicity
Sometimes a soul wanders
to find somewhere safer
not in the shape of a building
a house full of material things
A soul can fear a mirror
Go ahead and ask me
to write you something happy
as I stare at a page so empty
I can write something trivial
mundane, daily activities
You don’t know me well enough
especially to live my life
to make such short-sighted assumptions.
That’s okay, though.
Everyone’s entitled to their own opinions,
no matter how flawed.