A New Year's Resolution to Leave Dundee

By William Topaz McGonagall

Welcome! thrice welcome! to the year 1893,

For it is the year I intend to leave Dundee,

Owing to the treatment I receive,

Which does my heart sadly grieve.

Every morning when I go out

The ignorant rabble they do shout

'There goes Mad McGonagall'

In derisive shouts as loud as they can bawl,

And lifts stones and snowballs, throws them at me;

And such actions are shameful to be heard in the city of Dundee.

And I'm ashamed, kind Christians, to confess

That from the Magistrates I can get no redress.

Therefore I have made up my mind in the year of 1893

To leave the ancient City of Dundee,

Because the citizens and me cannot agree.

The reason why? — because they disrespect me,

Which makes me feel rather discontent.

Therefore to leave them I am bent;

And I will make my arrangements without delay,

And leave Dundee some early day.