HIS NEW BROTHER

Say, I've got a little brother,

Never teased to have him, nuther,

But he's here;

They just went ahead and bought him,

And, last week the doctor brought him,

Wa'n' t that queer?

When I heard the news from Molly,

Why, I thought at first‘ t was jolly,

‘ Cause, you see,

I s'posed I could go and get him

And then Mama, course, would let him

Play with me.

But when I had once looked at him,

“Why!” I says, “My sakes, is that him?

Just that mite!”

They said, “Yes,” and, “Ai n't he cunnin’?”

And I thought they must be funnin’,—

He's a sight!

He's so small, it's just amazin’,

And you‘ d think that he was blazin’,

He's so red;

And his nose is like a berry,

And he's bald as Uncle Jerry

On his head.

Why, he is n't worth a dollar!

All he does is cry and holler

More and more;

Wo n't sit up — you can n't arrange him,—

I do n't see why Pa do'n' t change him

At the store.

Now we've got to dress and feed him,

And we really did n't need him

More‘ n a frog;

Why'd they buy a baby brother,

When they know I'd good deal ruther

Have a dog?