Mother's Excuses

Mother for me made excuses

When I was a little tad;

Found some reason for my conduct

When it had been very bad.

Blamed it on a recent illness

Or my nervousness and told

Father to be easy with me

Every time he had to scold.

And I knew, as well as any

Roguish, healthy lad of ten,

Mother really was n't telling

Truthful things to father then.

I knew I deserved the whipping,

Knew that I'd been very bad,

Knew that mother knew it also

When she intervened with dad.

I knew that my recent illness

Had n't anything to do

With the mischief I'd been up to,

And I knew that mother knew.

But remembering my fever

And my nervous temperament,

Father put away the shingle

And postponed the sad event.

Now his mother, when I threaten

Punishment for this and that,

Calls to mind the dreary night hours

When beside his bed we sat.

Comes and tells me that he's nervous,

That's the reason he was bad,

And the boy and doting mother

Put it over on the dad.

Some day when he's grown as I am,

With a boy on mischief bent,

He will hear the timeworn story

Of the nervous temperament.

And remembering the shingle

That aside I always threw,

All I hope is that he'll let them

Put it over on him, too.