POTPOURRI

There are many more Maxims to which

I would like to accord a front place,

But alas! I have got

To omit a whole lot,

For the lack of available space;

And the rest I am forced to boil down and condense

To the following Essence of Sound without Sense:

Now the Pitcher that journeys too oft

To the Well will get broken at last.

But you'll find it a fact

That, by using some tact,

Such a danger as this can be past.

( There's an obvious way, and a simple, you'll own,

Which is, if you're a Pitcher, to Let Well alone. )

Half a loafer is never well-bred,

And Self-Praise is a Dangerous Thing.

And the mice are at play

When the Cat is away,

For a moment, inspecting a King.

( Tho’ if Care kills a Cat, as the Proverbs declare,

It is right to suppose that the King will take care. )

Do n't Halloo till you're out of the Wood,

When a Stitch in Good Time will save Nine,

While a Bird in the Hand

Is worth Two, understand,

In the Bush that Needs no Good Wine.

( Tho’ the two, if they Can sing but Wo n't, have been known,

By an accurate aim to be killed with one Stone. )

Never Harness the Cart to the Horse;

Since the latter should be a la carte.

Also, Birds of a Feather

Come Flocking Together,

— Because they can n't well Flock Apart.

( You may cast any Bread on the Waters, I think,

But, unless I'm mistaken, you can n't make it Sink. )

It is only the Fool who remarks

That there Ca n't be a Fire without Smoke;

Has he never yet learned

How the gas can be turned

On the best incombustible coke?

( Would you value a man by the checks on his suits,

And forget‘ que c'est le premier passbook qui Coutts?’ )

Now‘ De Mortuis Nil Nisi Bonum,’

Is Latin, as ev'ry one owns;

If your domicile be

Near a Mortuaree,

You should always avoid throwing bones.

( I would further remark, if I could,— but I could n't —

That People Residing in Glasshouses should n't. )

You have heard of the Punctual Bird,

Who was First in presenting his Bill;

But I pray you'll be firm,

And remember the Worm

Had to get up much earlier still;

( So that, if you can n't rise in the morning, then Do n't;

And be certain that Where there's a Will there's a Wo n't. )

You can give a bad name to a Dog,

And hang him by way of excuse;

Whereas Hunger, of course;

Is by far the Best Sauce

For the Gander as well as the Goose.

( But you should n't judge any one just by his looks,

For a Surfeit of Broth ruins too many Cooks. )

With the fact that Necessity knows

Nine Points of the Law, you'll agree.

There are just as Good Fish

To be found on a Dish

As you ever could catch in the Sea.

( You should Look ere you Leap on a Weasel Asleep,

And I've also remarked that Still Daughters Run Cheap. )

The much trodden-on Lane will Turn,

And a Friend is in Need of a Friend;

But the Wisest of Saws,

Like the Camel's Last Straws,

Or the Longest of Worms, have an end.

So, before out of Patience a Virtue you make,

A decisive farewell of these maxims we'll take.