THE BALLAD OF HAMPSTEAD HEATH

From Heaven's Gate to Hampstead Heath

Young Bacchus and his crew

Came tumbling down, and o'er the town

Their bursting trumpets blew.

The silver night was wildly bright,

And madly shone the Moon

To hear a song so clear and strong,

With such a lovely tune.

From London's houses, huts and flats,

Came busmen, snobs, and Earls,

And ugly men in bowler hats

With charming little girls.

Sir Moses came with eyes of flame,

Judd, who is like a bloater,

The brave Lord Mayor in coach and pair,

King Edward, in his motor.

Far in a rosy mist withdrawn

The God and all his crew,

Silenus pulled by nymphs, a faun,

A satyr drenched in dew,

Smiled as they wept those shining tears

Only Immortals know,

Whose feet are set among the stars,

Above the shifting snow.

And one spake out into the night,

Before they left for ever,

“Rejoice, rejoice!” and his great voice

Rolled like a splendid river.

He spake in Greek, which Britons speak

Seldom, and circumspectly;

But Mr. Judd, that man of mud,

Translated it correctly.

And when they heard that happy word,

Policemen leapt and ambled:

The busmen pranced, the maidens danced,

The men in bowlers gambolled.

A wistful Echo stayed behind

To join the mortal dances,

But Mr Judd, with words unkind,

Rejected her advances.

And passing down through London Town

She stopped, for all was lonely,

Attracted by a big brass plate

Inscribed, FOR MEMBERS ONLY.

And so she went to Parliament,

But those ungainly men

Woke up from sleep, and turned about,

And fell asleep again.