THE CHOICE

‘ Go! Sound the fire alarm!’ she cried.

‘ My house is all ablaze inside!

‘ The flames are spreading far and wide;

‘ The air with smoke is laden!

‘ My darling's in an upper room!

‘ Oh, save him from a fiery tomb!’

Straight, as she spoke, through sparks and fume

Came brave Lieutenant Sladen.

Quoth he:‘ The horsed-escape is here, ma'am;

‘ We'll save your husband, never fear, ma'am!’

‘ My husband?’ she replied.‘ Nay, nay!

‘ Do n't waste your time on him, I pray,

‘ But turn your thoughts without delay

‘ To things that really matter.

‘ For though my weaker-half's asleep,

‘ A faithful lap-dog, too, I keep,

‘ And if I hold the former cheap,

‘ I idolise the latter.

‘ Gladly, to save the best of bow-wows,

‘ I'd sacrifice,’ she sobbed,‘ my spou-ouse!

‘ How prettily my nose he licks!

‘ ( I'm speaking of the dog ) and pricks

‘ His ears and barks, while as for tricks

‘ He never seems to tire, man!

‘ He'll balance sugar on his snout ——’

From burning windows came a shout;

Her husband suddenly leaned out

And thus addressed the fireman:

‘ You've seen the sort of wife I cherish;

‘ Then be humane and — let me perish!’