THE GOVERNOR

By Edgar Lee Masters

I'm home at last. How long were you asleep?

I startled you. The time? It's midnight past.

Put on your slippers and your robe, my dear,

And make some coffee for me — what a night!

Yes, tell you? I shall tell you everything.

I must tell someone, and a wife should know

The workings of a governor's mind — no one

Could guess what turned the scale to save this man

Who would have died to-morrow, but for me.

That's fine. This coffee helps me. As I said

This night has been a trial. Well, you know

I told these lawyers they could come at eight,

And so they came. A seasoned lawyer one,

The other young and radical, both full

Of sentiment of some sort. And there you sit,

And do not say a word of disapproval.

You smile, which means you sun yourself within

The power I have, and yet do you approve?

This man committed brutal murder, did

A nameless horror; now he's saved from death.

The father and the mother of the girl,

The neighborhood, perhaps, in which she lived

Will roar against me, think that I was bought,

Or used by someone I'm indebted to

In politics. Oh no! It's really funny,

Since it is simpler than such things as these.

And no one, saving you, shall know the secret.

For there I sat and did n't say a word

To indicate, betray my thought; not when

The thing came out that moved me. Let them read

The doctor's affidavits, that this man

Was crazy when he killed the girl, and read

The transcript of the evidence on the trial.

They read and talked. At last the younger lawyer,

For sometime still, kept silent by the other,

Pops out with something, reads an affidavit,

As foreign to the matter as a story

Of melodrama color on the screen,

Which still contained a sentence that went home;

I felt my mind turn like a turn-table,

And click as when the switchman kicks the tongue

Of steel into the slot that holds the table.

And from my mind the engine, that's the problem,

Puffed, puffed and moved away, out on the track,

And disappeared upon its business. How

Is that for metaphor? Your coffee, dear,

Stirs up my fancy. But to tell the rest,

If my face changed expression, or my eye

Betrayed my thought, then I have no control

Of outward seeming. For they argued on

An hour or so thereafter. And I asked

Re-reading of the transcript where this man

Told of his maniac passion, of the night

He killed the girl, the doctors’ testimony

I had re-read, and let these lawyers think

My interest centered there, and my decision

Was based upon such matters, and at last

The penalty commuted. When in truth

I tell you I had let the fellow hang

For all of this, except that I took fire

Because of something in this affidavit

Irrelevant to the issue, reaching me

In something only relevant to me.

O, well, all life is such. Our great decisions

Flame out of sparks, where roaring fires before,

Not touching our combustibles wholly failed

To flame or light us.

Now the secret hear.

Do you remember all the books I read

Two years ago upon heredity,

Foot-notes to evolution, the dynamics

Of living matter? Well, it was n't that

That made me save this fellow. There you smile

For knowing how and when I got these books,

Who woke my interest in them. Never mind,

You do n't know yet my reasons.

But I'll tell you:

And let you see a governor's mind at work.

When this young lawyer in this affidavit

Read to a certain place my mind strayed off

And lived a time past, you were present too.

It was that morning when I passed my crisis,

Had just dodged death, could scarcely speak, too weak

To lift a hand to feed myself, but needed

Vital replenishment of strength, and then

I got it in a bowl of oyster soup,

Rich cream at that. And as I live, my dear,

As this young lawyer read, I felt myself

In bed as I lay then, re-lived the weakness,

Could see the spoon that carried to my mouth

The appetizing soup, imagined there

The feelings I had then of getting fingers

Upon the rail of life again, how faint,

But with such clear degrees. Could see the hand

That held the spoon, the eyes that looked at me

In triumph for the victory of my strength,

Which battled, almost lost the prize of life.

It all came over me when this lawyer read:

Elenor Murray lately come from France

Found dead beside the river, was the cousin

Of this Fred Taylor, and had planned to come

To see the governor, death prevented her —

Suppose it had?

That affidavit, doubtless

Was read to me to move me for the fact

This man was kindred to a woman who

Served in the war, this lawyer was that cheap!

And is n't it as cheap to think that I

Could be persuaded by the circumstance

That Elenor Murray, she who nursed me once,

Was cousin to this fellow, if this lawyer

Knew this, and did he know it? I do n't know.

Had Elenor Murray lived she would have come

To ask her cousin's life — I know her heart.

And at the last, I think this was the thing:

I thought I'd do exactly what I'd do

If she had lived and asked me, disregard

Her death, and act as if she lived, repay

Her dead hands, which in life had saved my life.

Now, dear, your eyes have tears — I know — believe me,

I had no romance with this Elenor Murray.

Good Lord, it's one o'clock, I must to bed....

You get my story Merival? Do you think,

A softness in the heart went to the brain

And softened that? Well now I stress two things:

I can n't endure defeat, nor bear to see

An ardent spirit thwarted. What I've achieved

Has been through will that would not bend, and so

To see that in another wins my love,

And my support. Now take this Elenor Murray

She had a will like mine, she worked her way

As I have done. And just to hear that she

Had planned to see me, ask for clemency

For this condemned degenerate, made me say

Shall I let death defeat her? Take the breach

And make her death no matter in my course?

For as I live if she had come to me

I had done that I did. And why was that?

No romance! Never that! Yet human love

As friend can keep for friend in this our life

I felt for Elenor Murray — and for this:

It was her will that would not take defeat,

Devotion to her work, and in my case

This depth of friendship welling in her heart

For human beings, that I shared in — there

Gave tireless healing to her nursing hands

And saved my life. And for a life a life.

This criminal will live some years, we'll say,

Were better dead. All right. He'll cost the state

Say twenty thousand dollars. What is that

Contrasted with the cost to me, if I

Had let him hang? There is a bank account,

Economies in the realm of thought to watch.

And do n't you think the souls — let's call them souls —

Of these avenging, law abiding folk,

These souls of the community all in all

Will be improved for hearing that I did

A human thing, and profit more therefrom

Than though that sense of balance in their souls

Struck for the thought of crime avenged, the law

Fulfilled and vindicated? Yes, it's true.

And Merival spoke up and said: “It's true,

I understand your story, and I'm glad.

It's like you and I'll tell my jury first,

And they will scatter it, what moved in you

And how this Elenor Murray saved a life.”

The talk of waste in human life was constant

As Coroner Merival took evidence

At Elenor Murray's inquest. Everyone

Could think of waste in some one's life as well

As in his own.

John Scofield knew the girl,

Had worked for Arthur Fouche, her grandfather,

And knew what course his life took, how his fortune

Was wasted, dwindled down.

Remembering

A talk he heard between this Elenor Murray

And Arthur Fouche, her grandfather, he spoke

To Coroner Merival on the street one day: