Ruby - Astari Boedikoentjara
A strange dream about you
We were on an open field,
when I heard you say:
“Here’s where I buried
some older parts of me.”
Is it difficult for you
to criticise the person
despite their outer appearance
or even origin?
Yeah, speaking from experiences
Tell you what?
They’ll suggest that accept
that this has never been a perfect world.
One way or another,
we’re all bound to hurt,
so just deal with it.
No signs of warning.
Everything was fine.
A face smiling,
sincere and kind.
A picture-perfect romance,
I don’t expect you to see
all the good in me
all that I’d like to be
anything lovely.
I need this
I had to leave you
behind me, before 2023
My messages have gone unreplied
You were probably busy
and I chose to be kind
by not accusing you of pure ignorance
I read your sweet words on the screen
enough what I’ve seen
I bet you wish you were there
right where she’s always been
She’s had her head in the clouds
You demand
to be the centre of your lover’s attention
as if she’s not allowed a life of her own
It’s the double standard
of the one feeling more entitled
I think I’ve run out of sedatives
just to numb the pain within.
I know, they can be addictive,
but I can’t deal with my feelings.
These days, they can be overwhelming.
“How do I catch monsters?”
I’m probably one of the many girls
who asks such a question.
They’re welcomed to wonder:
“Why do you wish to catch any monsters?
Mommy, I'm scared
We've talked about this before
briefly, but I was still being straight
to the point that worries you more
Mommy, I'm still scared
They think her life is always easy
far away from poverty
Spend away and be free
Oh, they have no idea
It’s a hard worker’s earned paradise