Ruby - Astari Boedikoentjara
The dawn isn’t close enough,
yet I am jolted awake
from a dream that felt
like a time machine,
throwing me back to the past, so mean.
(Dark Thoughts of The Bullied)
It's more than a vacant space
or lack of expression on one's face
It doesn't contain nothing,
I’m not looking for romance
I don’t even want to dance
still unsure with you,
‘though you seem honest and true
I don’t know
Oh, you're so dying to be right
assuming us in complete denial
clearly begging for that spotlight
Your accusations are beyond wild
way out of line
I’d like to be
right in-between
asleep and awake
Is it too hard to take?
It’s the only place
They say patience is a virtue
and fairy tales aren’t true.
There’s no such thing as ‘love at a first sight.
Such a childish mentality isn’t right.
I know we’ve just met
Love is weird
Sometimes it ignites my fear
Maybe it’s often mistaken
confused with a sad obsession
You think he’s the one
I had the strangest, most vivid dream.
I heard your voice, faintly somewhere in the distance,
yet my phone was still off and charging.
Was it my imagination?
Was my mind playing tricks on me again?
I am sick to death of you
turning her all black and blue
taking over her already tortured soul
making her feel less than whole
I’ve had it with you
I’m not arrogant
I’ve been adjusted to being alone
solving problems on my own
afraid to be (too) dependent
the moment I start asking
for your assistance
Are you afraid of my face?
I am human too,
just like you.
This face represents me.
This is part of my identity.
How to recognise me,
I must do what’s right
kicking you out
out of my sight
You were never mine
I was stupid and blind
but now I’m fine