Ruby - Astari Boedikoentjara
You don’t know me well enough
especially to live my life
to make such short-sighted assumptions.
That’s okay, though.
Everyone’s entitled to their own opinions,
no matter how flawed.
Make sure you have something
worth watching for
because you demand
your audience’s attention,
taking up their time
absorbing their energy
I need to be brave
to show you these feelings I have
For too long I’ve been imprisoned
by my own creation of silence
I’ve been too scared
We’re not in school anymore
but grown-ups for sure
although some are adults
only by the digits of their age
but with such questionable attitude
Questions with questions
That’s how you answer
Not much you mention,
‘though you’re such talkers
How to expect you to understand,
Have I put myself on exile for too long,
that solitude no longer feels wrong?
Just hollow,
a vacant space without a vibrant soul.
I’m afraid to forget
You may complain
about the rain
It’s hard to go home
without getting drenched
Nights are long
The city traffic’s a bitch
I am way past that envy
or that so-called jealousy.
Just a silent observer
to the oblivious or ignorant
to the fact that we’re all different
and the universe always has a way
I believe there’s a reason
your shattered heart’s been revealed
even when you refuse to mention
or worry you may never heal
I know I’m just a stranger
Another year gone by
left without questions why
The same old rituals
the familiar matters
The same old, mundane conversation
Information jumbled-up
requiring double, triple-checks
even as all floods
right into your brain and heart
The clock is ticking
We can still see each other,
thanks to the webcam on our computers
or hear each other on our phones.
Still,
some things are irreplacable.
