Ruby - Astari Boedikoentjara
We’re not in school anymore
but grown-ups for sure
although some are adults
only by the digits of their age
but with such questionable attitude
The secondhand poem
you once wrote for me
now used to woo another lady
Boy, you’re so lazy!
If she knew the backstory,
she’d be displeased
I need to be brave
to show you these feelings I have
For too long I’ve been imprisoned
by my own creation of silence
I’ve been too scared
I believe there’s a reason
your shattered heart’s been revealed
even when you refuse to mention
or worry you may never heal
I know I’m just a stranger
Are you coming home tonight?
I’m waiting for you
I’d rather stay up
because your phone cannot be reached through
Where are you now?
Go back to the ancient age
if you still see us such potential threats
It’s not that we don’t need people
to sometimes save us from trouble
We’re good as can be
Be grateful that I’ve kept quiet
as you blab to every pair of ear
who probably refuse to hear
your sob stories
your endless miseries
There's no amnesty granted
Reach deeply into your pockets
their eyeballs jump out of their sockets
Perhaps you secretly wish I’d talk to you
the way I used to
like I fear silently
whether you’ll really listen to me
or just give me some more scrutiny
Who are you, really?
So you still haven’t given up on me
How to make you see?
Stop acting like you’re oh-so-desirable
Perhaps you’re one of the little kids
dreaming of becoming superheroes
saving the world
wherever they go
Wouldn’t that be wonderful?
If you only knew
what I've been too scared to tell you,
what would you do?
If I were much braver for what's painfully true,
would you say our budding friendship is through?