Ruby - Astari Boedikoentjara
You use your bitter past
to ensure their hopes won’t last.
“Be realistic,”
that’s what you always say
making sure your message sticks.
Go ahead
Just pretend you’ve never done anything bad
My suffering is what you claim
as me, playing the victim
The longer this calamity lasts,
You demand
to be the centre of your lover’s attention
as if she’s not allowed a life of her own
It’s the double standard
of the one feeling more entitled
(Dark Thoughts of The Bullied)
It's more than a vacant space
or lack of expression on one's face
It doesn't contain nothing,
You’ll never know
but he misses the old days
when you seemed to love him so,
in your arms, he’d felt safe and protected.
You only see
I sometimes fall asleep
and find myself there again
back to the same quiet streets
and my two best friends
I miss those peaceful streets
How can you catch a break
at the never-ending hurdles before you?
The bumps and cracks are nothing new.
More endless tasks to finish too.
Sysyphus must’ve been a human pinball,
Losing track of time,
does it even exist?
Nothing comes out right,
not...with a lot to miss.
Body on autopilot.
You’ll probably see me
an offbeat character at this party
a plain, simple girl-next-door
wondering what she could possibly offer
What? Who??
The word is out
Now they know what you’re all about
No more doubts
It’s just you and your big mouth
You’re freaking out
From promises made
to smiles faked
I know what’s broken
from your excuses spoken
I know I’m mostly silent
but I ain’t being golden
No more magic?
Why vacant as it is?
Who took all of it?
Nothing to pick.
Dementors have resided,
