Ruby - Astari Boedikoentjara
The bitch-fest seems to drag on and on
No wonder the soap operas’ ratings are down
Each finds ways to stab their opponents
perhaps until all is completely gone
What’s with the bad blood?
Call me by my name
Know who I am
It’s my identity
if you wish to speak to me
It’s a simple request
Didn’t you hear me say ‘no’?
When you first asked me
to do what you wanted me to
and become whom you thought I should be,
I even declined politely
Have I put myself on exile for too long,
that solitude no longer feels wrong?
Just hollow,
a vacant space without a vibrant soul.
I’m afraid to forget
If time were relative,
then I’d like a pause
for a sense of relief
without any cause.
Let me roam around,
A night when we cross paths
a blast from the past
the way you look at me
full of familiarity
I know you’re still curious
You demand
to be the centre of your lover’s attention
as if she’s not allowed a life of her own
It’s the double standard
of the one feeling more entitled
I sometimes fall asleep
and find myself there again
back to the same quiet streets
and my two best friends
I miss those peaceful streets
Advice?
More of them?
Truth or lies?
Should I give a damn?
I understand
“I heard rage in your sleep,”
The Mighty Queen said.
“My child, what has gone so deep,
stealing the peacefulness in your dreams?”
“I forgot,”
I’m not arrogant
I’ve been adjusted to being alone
solving problems on my own
afraid to be (too) dependent
the moment I start asking
for your assistance
Will I see you
sometime in the near future?
You sound sure
You keep convincing me
your intention is true
